Happy 1 month birthday to my sweet little love! It has been longer than I anticipated since I last blogged, but it is hard to type and snuggle at the same time. Life has been so good over here. I truly love being at home with my boys and they love it too. (Well Ben at least tells me that he does!) I'm going to do my best to write these monthly posts again! I think I made it (almost) to 18 months with Ben so I have to be sure to do that this time around, to be fair, of course.
I had so much fun doing the 1 month photo shoot--- so many good ones to choose from! Although I'm not really missing work at the moment, I'll use my work note format to write these monthly posts. ;)
GENERAL: Josh, you are the sweetest little guy. You are so content most of the time and even when you get upset, you calm pretty easily. You prefer to be held, but you are typically happy for at least a little while when you're put down. You love baths, being talked or sung to, and being with your big brother who, for the record, continues to ADORE you. You had your 1 month check up today and you weigh 8# 5.3oz and you are 20.25 inches. You've grown a lot in a month! You are perfection!
SLEEP: Your sleep has been pretty good, but we are still struggling to find a good, safe place for you to sleep. You love sleeping on your tummy, but this scares me because of the whole SIDS thing. You also like to be in our bed, which again is a safe sleep no-no. You also love to be held to sleep, and we try to prop you up at least a little bit. You usually will sleep for about 3-4 hours at a time at night, sometimes a little longer. When you wake up you will eat and then you usually go right back to sleep. You have a fussier time around 4:00AM or so where you seem to want to be awake, but then you will fall asleep again. You don't like to be swaddled so we have to figure out how you like to sleep that isn't on your tummy until you're able to roll!
EATING: You are a great eater! You seemed to have slight reflux initially, but that is a lot better and now you rarely spit up. You are currently nursing about every 2-3 hours around the clock, maybe a little less often at night. You will eat for about 5 minutes on one side and then you're done. I'd be a little concerned about the quantity but you're gaining weight so nicely that you must just be efficient! You have yet to try a bottle but the pediatrician suggested that we start trying this, as it is a good time to introduce the bottle without too much resistance. I have about 10 bags of milked stored up thus far, but I know I'll need a lot more when I go back to work! I have to mention that it is approximately a million times easier to nurse than it is to pump and then bottle feed. This helps so much with the sleep deprivation!
COMMUNICATION/COGNITION: You have become so much more alert! The pediatrician was so impressed and loved how responsive and expressive you were. You are cooing and it seems like you may even be smiling purposefully. You are tracking and you love lights and windows. You also LOVE your big brother, which is great because he loves you too. This might be one of my favorite pictures of all time. Melts my heart every time I look at it.
FINE/GROSS MOTOR: You are such a strong little babe! I am pretty sure you were born with head control. I'd call it fair head control, by my scale. ;) You like being on your tummy and can turn your head both ways and you are even starting to lift it up a little bit. You definitely inch around when you are in our bed and there have been a few times where I was afraid you were going to roll over. We have to keep our eyes on you!
I can't say it enough, we love you SO much! You are the perfect addition to our little family and I love that I get to hang out with you 24/7. I am so excited to watch you grow and become best buddies with Benji. Thanks to you, he now likes to be photographed again, that little stinker. ;)
Happy 2015! We rang in the new year with Andy making us a nice dinner before we went to bed around 10:00PM. :) It worked for me! I could (and probably should) write a whole blog post about how awesome Andy has been! I'm so sad he has to go back to work on Monday. Can't we just all hang out and do fun things 24/7/365?!?
We had big plans to play board games on NYE but sleep was much more appealing. Actually, we can't complain about lack of sleep. Mr. Josh is a pretty great sleeper. Additionally, nursing is surprisingly going MUCH better this time around. With Ben, I was pumping every 2-3 hours around the clock. By the time I would finish pumping, I would still have to feed him, and no sooner would I get in to bed to try and sleep and it would be time to do it all over again. I did that for a solid 6 weeks straight and I was (we were) SO tired! After that I was able to pump a little less, but it was still a ridiculous amount of time. I think I added up the total amount of time I spent pumping that year and it was like weeks! To say the least, it is amazing to just be able to nurse.
I am just happy to be feeling good these days! I had a rough several days with a horrible rash. I'll spare the details but I was absolutely MISERABLE! I saw the doctor twice and also took a trip to the ER, but thankfully I finally was able to see my actual OB who thinks I had an allergic reaction to one of the medications I received in the OR. We will probably never know which med it was, but after a course of oral steroids, I feel like a new girl.
I probably won't be writing weekend posts over my maternity leave since I imagine my weeks and weekends will run together, but I'm still going to try and post regularly to at least include some pictures.
I think I mentioned this in the last post, but based on recommendations from the pediatrician and our own common senses, we decided to keep Josh away from visitors for his first few weeks. There is so much going around and it just wasn't worth risking him getting sick. Besides, I was feeling pretty crummy too. Although I was sad to not be able to hang out as a family, Ben and Andy were total party animals and went to 5 different celebrations! Ben loved it. He is seriously always up for a party! On 12/23, they went to Andy's parents for the annual "Eve of the Eve" party. On Christmas Eve, they went over to my mom's during the afternoon to see our cousins. We did all hang out together on Christmas Eve in the evening and my mom and John came over to provide me with a little social interaction and FOOD! :) Clearly we didn't dress up for the occasion.
Actually, Josh did dress up, but then he spit up all over himself about 3 minutes later.
Christmas morning was fun watching Ben open presents. He loved everything and wanted to open and play with every present immediately after he opened them.
After we did our family Christmas thing, Andy and Ben were off to my cousin's house for the next celebration. Again, Ben was in heaven. Especially since he had Hannah and Emmy to play with. They ended their night at Andy's parents' house. I'm pretty sure Ben got close to a million presents this Christmas.
Meanwhile, Josh and I had fun at home. He was such a good sport about letting me dress him like a little doll.
Although I don't have many pictures to prove it, Josh and I finally got to participate in a Christmas celebration! On the Sunday after Christmas, we went to my mom's to do Christmas with her. It was only my immediate family plus Auntie Gail, so I wasn't as concerned about germs. This was also the day I went to the ER so I wasn't feeling the greatest, but it was still nice to get out!
My mom's festiveness never disappoints!
We are all sad that Christmas is over. I hate to say it, but it didn't really even feel like Christmas this year. It finally snowed this weekend and I feel like we should put our Christmas music back on! Instead, we spent the day taking down our Christmas decor. (Much to Ben's disappointment and questioning, "why?") We have managed to take a few more outings, but mostly we are just trying to stay home and healthy! Here is a little bit of what we've been up to:
Auntie Anna took Ben to the pool. She is much more fun than me! He had a blast!
And then the next day, it was snowman time! He finally got to put all of his winter gear to good use!
I got in lots of quality time with this guy! I cannot get enough of this sweet boy!
Ben is totally in love with his "baby bruver" and it is pretty much the sweetest thing ever. He also loves when "daddy-o holds both boys." He misses me carrying him around, but he totally understands that I have a "big owie" on my tummy and he will actually remind me that I can't carry/lift him just yet. Sweetie pie.
We made it out for lunch on New Years Day! For the record, Ben was blowing Andy and me away with everything he was eating, including a soft pretzel. Ahh, the little things.
We HAD to take Josh to our favorite restaurant too since it wasn't opened on New Year's Day. I'm pretty sure he loved it.
In between our outings, Ben has been busy breaking in each and every Christmas present.
He is also getting in lots of snuggles with his "bruver." He has done so well with his transition to the big brother role. It was probably harder for me than it was for him. He gets a tad bit jealous here and there and he definitely seems to be trying to get more attention than usual, but he is still an angel 99% of the time. He loves helping by getting diapers and letting me know when the baby cries, and then telling me he needs "mommy milk." (Which he informed me Andy cannot provide because daddy-o does not have boobies…only nipples. Hahah!) I am just so proud of this big boy!
Last but not least, we had some of our first visitors today.
Ben was showing off a bit, but he was one happy boy with his Hannah and Emmy!
Miraculously, both boys are sleeping at the moment so I am savoring some quiet time! I am so excited to have the next 10 weeks to spend with my boys, but I'm also so scared for Andy to go back to work! And with that, Ben is UP and ready to play.
Today is my official due date, and I am holding my sweet little boy in one hand while typing with the other. I am so content. I would be lying if I said I didn't miss my other 2 boys, who are celebrating Christmas with my cousins at my mom's, but I decided that I have too much to be happy about to dwell on what I'm missing.
I suppose I should officially announce and welcome Joshua Joseph, born 12.18.14 @ 0933 weighing in at 6#8oz and measuring 19.25 inches long. He is perfect! As many would say, he looks just like Ben. He also has Ben's 6th sense of being able to tell the exact moment that he is placed into his bassinet and therefore wakes up. :) I'm going to try and recap Josh's birthday as long as it is still fairly fresh in my mind.
As I believe I mentioned in the past, I went back and forth as to whether or not I should have a VBAC versus a repeat c-section. Honestly, I really wanted a VBAC, but when I looked at the stats, big picture, and after talking with my OB, Andy, and my mom, I realized that a c/s was the least risky way of getting to meet my boy. I'll never know when he would have decided to come on his own, but now that he is here I can't imagine waiting another second to meet him!
Surprisingly, my OB said there were a lot of people due around the holidays, and due to his busy schedule, we had to arrive to the hospital at 0400 for a 0600 start time if we wanted him to do the c/s. Somehow, Andy and I were able to fall asleep fairly easily and we got about 5 hours of sleep that night. Ben slept at my mom's so that we wouldn't have to worry about him. I missed him. He missed us. I almost started crying when my mom sent this picture of him staring at my picture that morning.
We arrived right on time. It was dark and a little eerie walking in to the hospital at that hour, but we were too excited to be creeped out. We met our RN, the anesthesia resident, got my IV started (2 pokes), and got hooked up to the monitors. My OB called to make sure everything was still on schedule and to say that he was on his way.
Unfortunately, by the time he arrived, things had changed. There are 2 ORs and they only use one at a time in case there is an emergency. Right before we were going to start, another momma to be who had been laboring and not progressing for a long time needed a c/s, and thus I got bumped. My OB was also her OB, so he had to do hers. This meant that he was then unable to do mine. I was super bummed! Fortunately, there was another great OB who was potentially going to do my c/s in the first place if we didn't want to arrive at 4:00AM. So, although we were down some sleep and my wonderful OB wasn't able to do my c/s, I knew I was still in good hands. The pre-op waiting room is right outside the OR, so it was a little hard when I heard baby Ava crying knowing that it should have been Baby Fish, but I'm sure stuff like this happens all the time in the world of babies!
It was finally my turn to go back a little after 9:00. I walked back there to get my spinal while Andy waited for them to get my all ready. I obviously wasn't looking forward to the needle in my back, but I remembered it not being that bad last time. The attending looked at by back first. She probably jinxed it when she said, "she has palpable and visual spaces" for the needle to be placed. Then comes the resident. She told me to round my back and stay completely still. I did exactly what I was told, with the nurse in front of me, coaching me too. At one point, my whole left leg/butt twitched from what I am assuming was her triggering a nerve with the needle. She then told me again to stay still--as if that was a voluntary movement. Sheesh! After I told her I could definitely feels something different on the left side (hoping I wasn't going to be paralyzed!) she finally got things in the right spot. Or so I thought. I remembered this from last time, that after the spinal was in, they quickly got everything else ready so they could start the c/s. They did a sensation test every few minutes. I didn't go numb as quickly as they thought, so they had to put me in an upside-down position to let gravity do the trick. When I was finally numb, they brought Andy back and got started.
I was a little nervous, but I didn't feel them make the incision so I took that as a good sign. After awhile though, things got much more painful than I remember them being. I knew I would feel pressure, but I was almost crying as I squeezed Andy's hand. I can't remember if I asked for more pain medication or not, but they gave me something which still did not help. I couldn't feel everything, but I was not comfortable. They gave me a second pain med (ketamine) which I did NOT like at all! I remember the room turning white and spinning and I felt like I was fading in an out of consciousness. Finally, after what seemed like forever, I heard a baby crying! I was still out of it, but I knew that the crying baby noise was a good sign. I am pretty sure I heard them say that they needed to use a vacuum to get him out. I do know that his APGARS were 8 & 9. I remember them showing me his sweet self before they went to go check him out.
After he was all cleaned up, they brought him back for me to get a better look. I was still pretty confused and I kept asking why I felt like I did and when it was going to go away. They assured me that it wouldn't last long. I kept thinking that they were having me hold the baby (even though they weren't) and I kept saying, "I will drop him! Someone hold him! I don't feel right!" Andy and everyone else repeatedly assured me that I wasn't going to drop him.
Before I knew it, Andy and baby were off for baby's first bath while they stitched me up. So yeah, not the greatest birth experience, but I suppose all is well that ends well! I got my perfect, healthy boy and it doesn't get better than that! When my OB came to see me later, he seemed quite surprised by the meds they gave me. On the plus side, I didn't throw up at all! After Ben, I was throwing up for 8+ hours after delivery.
My recovery was rough initially, but overall it seems to be better than last time. Ben is so sweet in remembering that I cannot carry him because I have a big owie on my tummy. Speaking of Ben, he has done so well in his new role as the big brother. He has been acting out a little more than usual, but overall he is so sweet, loving, and gentle. He wants to kiss and hold him all the time. He has a bit of a cold so we are trying to limit their close contact, which is hard to do! This video isn't the first time they met (my dad has that one), but it is still sweet.
The nurses I had on the Mom/Baby unit were amazing. We even had my favorite nurse from when Ben was born. I just now realized that I didn't get pictures with any of the RNs, but we totally should have!
I am sure there are things that I am missing, but that's all I can think of for now. He already had his first pediatrician appointment and at 4 days old, he was almost back to his birth weight. He was/is a little jaundiced, but he doesn't need any further labs for this. He is nursing like a champ which was so surprising because nursing didn't exactly go well last time. My milk has also come in with a vengeance, just like last time, so I'm hoping that regulates soon!
The pediatrician recommended that we limit visitors for at least the first 2 weeks of his life to help him stay as healthy as possible. If a newborn gets a fever, he/she needs to be admitted to the hospital for a sepsis workup. For this reason, we decided that Josh and I will stay home from all of the Christmas festivities we have planned over the next several days. I did cry a bit--darn hormones--but I am just so grateful to be HOME and not in the NICU that I really can't complain. Andy has been sending pictures and my guess is Ben won't remember that I wasn't there. :)
Although we won't have a white Christmas this year, we are going to try and do everything we can to make this Christmas as festive as possible…at home! Clearly we already got the best gift every this year. We are so blessed. Merry Christmas to all!
